KRONOS MYTHBUSTERS!!!

As a public service, KRONOS Art Gallery would like to go behind the scenes to tell you, our friends, the true and often shocking tales of success at any cost of some of our most popular artists of the day.

E. Badley Dross is a regional artist whose quaint renderings of Americana are beloved by millions, to the point where she even has her own museum which is located on her own road, "E. Badley Dross Drive". But the truth behind her fame and fortune is that ALL of her paintings are mass-produced by 7 and 8 year-olds in Indonesian sweatshops who work 12-hour days for 12 cents and then are sold as sex slaves.

Boris Tinkaid, the "painter of illumination", whose paintings of picturesque cottages and sentimental landscapes are treasured by the masses, and who franchises galleries throughout the land devoted solely to his work, uses radioactive paint! Yes, the effects of light he achieves are the result of using Strontium-90 and Uranium-235 based paints, and long-term exposure to his canvases will result in radiation sickness and death similar to the effects suffered by the victims of Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

And then there's KRONOS favorite, New York City artist Zeff Moons. His whimsical creations sell for millions of dollars and are coveted by collectors and museums worldwide. Yet all of his artwork is tested on animals. Yes, it's true. Kittens, puppies, and bunny rabbits strapped to chairs in laboratories are forced to look at his art without relief, and in fact prolonged exposure to Zeff Moons' work has been proven to cause cancer and madness in laboratory animals.

So there you have it. The real price of success!

At KRONOS however, none of our artwork is EVER tested on animals. And it is all made by the actual artists themselves using non-toxic ovo-lacto-vegetarian-macrobiotic paint on certified organic canvas woven by Tibetan Buddhist monks on recycled wooden frames. So buy your art at KRONOS, "the gallery you can trust!"

THEATER @ KRONOS!!!

FRIDAY AUGUST 3rd & SATURDAY AUGUST 4th @ 8PM KRONOS makes history again with its first full-blown foray into theater with "Deliver Us Not (or Birth Where is Thy Sting?)", a one-act play by Lee Howard & Greg Gambel. Directed by Megan Hefner, the play takes place entirely in the womb with the three characters connected to umbilical cords which go offstage. The characters discuss life, death, religion, and impending birth (with a backdrop of 150 year old stone walls representing the womb). Starring Alejandro Rosa, Leigh Harrison, and Tom Arbaugh. Tickets $5. Call (540) 213-1815

ART OPENING a Smashing Success!!!

July 20th's ART OPENING was a smashing success, with a packed house, great new art by some of our favorite local & regional artists, and a fabulous solo show by our hero Christina Varga direct from the VARGA Gallery in Woodstock, NY! She hung her show "salon style", "the Show" room transformed into a kind of Bohemian art house, or rather an explosion of art, as if an art bomb had been set off inside KRONOS! You feel me? And while the people gathered were digging the art they were grooving to the tunes of LIVE DJ Brian Boyd. And at one point, the lights in "the Collection" room went off and everyone started dancing! (What other art gallery inspires people to dance?!) And of course we went well past 9pm, a great time had by all!

NEW ART OPENING!!!

FRIDAY, JULY 20th from 6-9pm, KRONOS, the gallery that's too cool for school, is proud to host an OPENING RECEPTION for "The Apple of My Eye: Paintings, Mosaics, Pixilations" by CHRISTINA VARGA, direct from the Varga Gallery in Woodstock, NEW YORK! This is a special event for us since Christina and her gallery were the inspiration for KRONOS! Come see why she is a Woodstock rebel & legend, her gallery being the premiere place in upstate NY for visionary, outsider, and emerging artists (keep that in mind, all you schmoozer-artists!). At the opening we'll have great food of course (pizza from Shenandoah Pizza), plus LIVE DJ Brian Boyd spinning techno, industrial, and dance grooves to give KRONOS an ultra-cool dance party vibe. Sunglasses definitely recommended! Plus, exciting work from these artists in "the Collection" room: Leslie Banta (mixed media paintings & collage), Elyse Cooner (mixed media paintings), Kim Willoughby (B&W photography), Jennifer Deane (political mixed media), Grail Ogzewalla (political mixed media), Brian Boyd (mixed media), Diana Young (pastel drawings), Piper Brown (floating Buddhas), Anonymous (political drawings), Samone Riddle & Charlene Schillinger (KRONOS t-shirts), & Kevin Postupack (mixed media paintings, photography, and subversive evil). The show runs from July 20th to August 30th! Be there or be pentagonal!

More Cool July Events!

This Thursday, July 12th, there'll be another POETRY NIGHT @ KRONOS starting at 8:30 with two featured readers: Karen Lawrence and Mari Selby. And this Friday July 13th (yes, another Friday the 13th!) at 8pm we're having another MUSIC NIGHT with "A Night at the Opera" featuring Beth Summers-Minette, a soprano and soloist with the San Francisco Conservatory of Music. She will be performing operatic arias from Purcell, Mozart, Puccini, and others (but probably no covers of Flyleaf or Evanescence). KRONOS Art Gallery--Where Anything Can Happen! B'lee dat!

The Mark of the Beast @ KRONOS!

Yesterday we had a VERY spontaneous heavy metal/ punk rock concert at KRONOS (the most METAL of art galleries!) and four (count 'em) bands rocked the shit out of the place and a normally quiet Sunday Staunton evening. The night started off with two local bands: Jonestown Massacre and Mirror Cage (Mirror Cage were especially heavy, and they're on their way to a primo gig at KRONOS's personal favorite, "The Masquerade" in Atlanta, Ga--where there are 3 floors: Heaven, Purgatory, and Hell). And then a punk band from Michael Moore's hometown of Flint, Michigan called The Swellers took the stage and sounded better than Greenday, and Detroit's Alucard rocked out the rest of the night with some major guitar shredding by our new friend Mike. Pounding eardrums, sweat all over the fuckin' place (as it was probably 100+ degrees in the Show Room) lots of great LOUD music by really cool enthusiastic young rockers who are payin' their dues livin' the dream, and art on the walls all askew! It's hard to believe we're having OPERA here later this week! KRONOS ROCKS!!!

Kevin's New Art Exhibits for July

Kevin Postupack, KRONOS's fearless leader is back on his meds, and to celebrate he has several shows going on this month (July 2007). In addition to his solo abstract photography show "SUNFIREWATERSKY" @ KRONOS Art Gallery (through July 19th) he has a solo show at The Mudhouse in Charlottesville. The show is called "Nouvelle Mosaique" ( multi-mixed media mosaics, including the infamous piece entitled "FUM"), and it opens Tuesday July 3rd with an opening reception on Friday July 6th from 6-8pm. The Mudhouse is located at the far end of the downtown open-air mall across from the movie theater. (213 W. Main St. Charlottesville, VA mudhouse@mudhouse.com).

Plus, at Circle Design, an architectural and design firm in Staunton, there are six of Kevin's pieces up now through the company's big opening party on Saturday July 14th. And on Monday July 9th at Coffee on the Corner in Staunton, Kevin will debut his strange and fascinating series of "Portraits" in a solo show which will run until September. So if you haven't seen Kevin's work up close, now's your chance muthafuckahs!